So stay there cause I'll be coming over

I've been wanting to post something since last month but since last month so many things happened until I don't know what to say. Basically everything that happened's pretty private. No point for me to gush or rant about it here. Apparently my face is an open book already. People seems to know whatever I feel or think by looking into my eyes. Pretty freaky but honestly true hahahah. April's mission: master the poker face.

Anyways, it's 7am on a Friday morning and I think I slept for a few hours tops. Woke up at 4am and has been awake ever since. And now I'm all blank again HAHAH. I don't think I can keep this up anymore boo hoo. But we'll see. Might get inspired to write (ir)relevant shit again.

HAVE A GREAT WEEKEND PEOPLE <3

Falling for forever, wonderfully wandering alone

I was scrolling down my twitter timeline today and I came across a tweet RTed by Lisa Ruocco (gag for many obvious reasons) and as much as I *dislike* her, the tweet was relevant enough for me to blog. It's a link to forbes.com where they listed down 40 Things To Say Before You Die. Whaaat is was inspirational and spiritual and all that good vibey shit kay. Something I most definitely need right now. (good) VIBES.

In the midst of all the things we should say before we die, a few words caught my eyes and hit a little close to  home.

NUMBER 28.
"How can I help you?"

Because you want people to come to your funeral, and if they can’t make it, at least they’ll miss you.

I give as much as I can to anybody who asks and sometimes without thinking of any form of consequences that might come along too. Rules of karma ain't it? You do good, you get good. You do bad, honey your favourite hoodie will rip in a blink of an eye without any warning signs. Or maybe not. Don't you ever wonder when you leave, spiritually or not, will there be people missing you? And will they be missing YOU or your willingness to help? Ponder your lovely thoughts on that.


NUMBER 18
"This is who I am."

The nervous energy spent pretending to be something you’re not is better spent on practically anything else.

Identity crisis. I wouldn't say I have it. But sometimes when you reach that point in your life where you start to second guess everything you do and find little interest in things you used to be obsessed with is a little frightening isn't it? Because you'll feel as though you're losing yourself and you don't recognise yourself anymore. To find serenity within is one of the hardest things to do. 

NUMBER 11

"I don't care."

Being able to discern between what’s important and what’s trivial is a skill that will save your sanity and your schedule.

Come on you'd be lying if you say you've never put in too much care in things you shouldn't have. I struggle to ignore the shit that would eventually ruin my mood but sometimes I just care too much. Prioritizing what's good for myself isn't my strong suit. It drives my mother mad most of the time especially when I'm too distracted with things other than my studies. (Concerts not included they are a priority to me xo)

NUMBER 5

"I'm terrified."

Fear is an asset. It can save you from danger and alert you to trouble. Don’t ignore the tingles that run up and down your spine.

To admit of being scared over a certain matter is not my thing. Break me down to my utmost core, I will not admit until I surrender. This has only happened a handful of times and if you're one of the people I said it to, you're a keeper in my books. I may run. It's true, I'm one of those kids who hides from people who cares when things get hard. Animal instincts? HAHA.

NUMBER 3

"I made a decision."

Autonomy transforms any activity from a chore to an act of destiny.

I AM BAD AT MAKING DECISIONS. If you've known me for awhile, you'll realise that I suck at making decisions. Especially for myself. I'm the kind of girl where I wouldn't know what colour of clothing to choose and ends up buying two pieces of the same clothing but different in colours. I'm also bad at making life changing decisions. I would love to say "I made a decision" without hesitation one day. 

Welp, there ya go. Out of the 40 things that were listed, 5 things made me think. There were more but these are ~special~ Click here to view the rest!

Hold me fast cause I'm a hopeless wanderer

As the evening rain touches everything on this side of town, I burn the little daylight left of the day. I'm so busy this week yet it surprises me how I would make time for things other than my studies a little too easily. One phone call sends me hailing for a cab, a sleepless night made me slumber away, the presence of a friend got me laughing until I quite literally roll down two beds, on the floor, towards the door. A downpour sends me typing away?

Two weeks into the year and I'm missing how happy I was this time, last year. I guess I would still be buzzing over Foster The People and Simple Plan. I've yet to go for my first show this year, missed a show in Australia when I literally had the chance to go (and meet the love of my life), still torn in between two shows in Malaysia, accepting the fact that Soundwave is a definite no no and I have no idea about the other show. BRUTAL SLAP IN THE FACE. Not to mention the workload I'm getting and the extra two subjects I have to take this year. My patience is wearing thin.

I need a concert soon.